Mini-Blog

There's a whiteboard on my wall by the window, over a desk. it has my daily to-do list on it. Today's to-do list had many items on it, and by God's grace i accomplished them all except one, which i'm working on now. That missing item read "post on blog". But see, that takes the fun out of it. I like to write when i have something to say and i feel like writing. My to-do list's cold stare makes it an obligation. Not fun. The good news is, i feel like writing now. My hand is cramping, but i have something to say, i think. Well actually, i have a lot of little things to say, which i will add to this post until i post it tomorrow. Kind of like a mini-blog. So here's to today's conflaggeration of thoughts...

Man-Made Charade
Yes, i'm talking about it, again. This time it's a little different. As my caregroup was discussing my post "Stage for an Alter", and the related topic, a little offspin came from it, kind of a shard of glass from the stained glass of the Stained Glass Masquerade, if you will. It was related to, not how WE put the masks on OURSELVES, but how others but the masks on US! An example would be this... Sally serves every 4rth week in Children's ministry. Sally hates serving every 4rth week in Children's ministry. One particular Sunday Sally goes through the motions, again, smiling and appearing to work hard. Emptying out the trash can, Sally overhears Evelyn and Ms Smegmyer talking. "What a hard worker Sally May is. It is so good to have her around. The youth in this church should really follow her example." Ms Smegmyer says. Sally forgets what she's doing, and walks away. ..."if only the youth in the church would follow her example... ...if only the youth in the church would follow my example... Next Sunday morning Sally's mom doesn't have to yell at her to get out of bed. sally makes quite an effort this morning to appear to fit what Ms Smegmeyer said. Sally makes quite an effort the next months, too. An effort to LOOK better, not to BE better, and to fit the mask. Sally is thanked by her pastor as being the most exemplerary youth in the church. Sally smiles behind the mask that was fitted over her... Can you see where this is going? Sometimes instead of masking our own inadequacy, it is masked by others, well meaning people who only seek to see and point out the good, or the perceived good, in others. Also on a different tack, another huge danger in the stained glass masquerade, is that sometimes the mask fools even US. When we look into the mirror and see the person we are made out to be instead of seeing ourselves as we truly are, we are in danger of being destroyed by what we perceive as the good, our own disguised arrogance. A disgusting analogy, but apt: scientists have found that some homeless people's clothing, which they have worn every day for years, has actually grafted itself to the persons skin, becoming, in essence, part of them. Beware when the mask you wear is part of you and there is little distinguishing between the two and no removing the one. Scary, huh.

Far too graphic
Man i have been busy with logo design and stuff the past weeks. That's a good thing. It's good when "Business" has a "Y" in the middle. And yes i just wrote this paragraph so i could have that line used somewhere :-P

So Sick
Ugh. I am disgusted with how people can act, and how i respond to it. How they can't seem to be even remotely kind. How they can't even see their own immaturity. They tear everyone apart, especially those perceived to be the weakest, of which i am apparently judged as. I am so sick of the "coolest people" and how these immature wannabes who have managed to climb to the top of their little ladder of peers (no doubt pushing others off) and how they and their status controls the minds of the people underneath them, causing those others to be cruel to their "uncool" so-called friends (who they act one way to in private and quite another in public) just to be advanced in the eyes of the "cool people" who really couldn't give a fig about them anyway. I want to spit in their faces. I am that disgusted with it all. Chelsey said "yall carry swords around your necks" referring to our quote "burns" and the comebacks, or lack-there-of, of everyone. Done in fun or not these words cut like hell. Why the heck can't we honestly ask the other person how they are doing, and at least pretend to care?

Uhhh...
Well i don't have anything much on my mind i haven't shared, now, except how i am trying my best to live like God would have m
e, but, God, it's just. So. Hard.