So i feel a little lonely right now. It's Christmas Eve, real late. I shouldn't feel lonely, i just saw all my friends tonight and i had a great time with my family afterwards. But - i do feel lonely. Not sure why, but writing is helping. And texting Ying. Oh and now my favorite song came on the radio... well not really my favorite... but it reminds me of Steph and that makes me laugh =P Well anyway. Christmas is tomorrow!! That makes me happy and sad at the same time. I like everything around Christmas, the whole atmosphere, but i'm sad too... for a couple reasons i can't share. And, because time has seemed to fly by so fast. I remember New Years Eve so clearly... Everything about it. And this new year's eve is just a week from now. Last year seems like the same distance. I've decided - i'm gonna pretend it's 1999 again instead of 2009 - i'm totally gonna break out my Alice in Chains on my Discman when the ball goes down =P Well i'm kidding, even though Alice in Chains is pretty good music... Anyway i can't hold on to the past. It's just hard, you know, to let it go. It's been a great year and i don't really want it to end - even though it's just the numbers changing it feels like something else changes too, like nothing coming up will be the same as it was... Well i probably should have saved this post for New Year's Eve, shouldn't i. Oh that's right - i planned to share my New Year's resolution and my 2009 year plan then. Anyhow this post needs to be more Christmassy-er. How about a picture or three?
Well this was only two. But yeah.
Merry Christmas yall!! I hope it's amazing and that you take time to reflect on the wonderfulness of family and friends, and most importantly, on Jesus Christ our Savior's birth!!
Ugh. Tonight is the 2 year anniversary, Meagan. We had such a great time that night. We were such good friends, and i blew it. I still miss your friendship, after these two years of silence... Why did i do the things i did, and come crawling back so pathetically to beg back your friendship, just so i could have another shot? You gave me many chances, and i blew each of them. I miss you still, i wish i wasn't so creepy then and that i had handled things differently. I also hope that this situation doesn't repeat itself, like i see it doing even now with others... well that's all i guess. No more chances left to take. God, don't let this happen with anybody else...
Well this was only two. But yeah.
2 comments:
Feel loved and not alone, Nathan. I know this is how you feel, but I think you should hear it again... God is always with you. Nothing matters but God. Whenever you feel lonely, remember that God is there with you. He will, "never leave you, nor forsake you."
I'm glad that you're finally getting into the Christmas spirit... I did too. Haha.
Amen, Wesley!
But, I can kinda relate, Nathan. This morning, we had our regular Christmas breakfast/gifts/Bible reading, but after that, it was done and we just sat around. That can be a little depressing. It's almost that I like love Christmas and this time of year, and now it's done--and won't be back for a whole year. And a whole year from now, a lot of things will probably be very different in my life.
In someways, I'm looking forward to the new year, but sometimes I wish I could stay in life--right here.
So, anyhow, I know sometimes it's nice to know someone understands you or how you feel. I would definitely encourage you to listen to Wesley's wise words and know that God is ALWAYS there and He is all that matters.
Merry Christmas =D
Post a Comment