I have no clue

But i want to post. This is going to be a total waste of your time reading this, as it is mine in writing. Oh well here goes anyway...

Life hasn't slowed down. it just keeps coming at me faster than before... good and bad... i can't really tell which is more - the good or the bad. When i look at all the bad, i get overwhelmed. Yet, when i look at the good, i'm equally overwhelmed. Right now i'm just trying to get my life in order and fulfill my responsibilities. But... i've got so much going on and getting worked out for me it's hard just to stay sane sometimes... but here i go, pressing on. Everything going on -from studio construction to high school, from intensive job searching to Audio Engineering class, from family matters to friend's troubles, from personal trials and private problems to many many errands, and anywhere and everwhere in between- seems to hit me at various times, spontaneously and rapidly. So much is good, so much is bad, but one thing i know is, it's certainly been and is definitely going to be.. interesting. Lord knows what He has for me - he just seems to tell me all of a sudden. My only option is to trust in what He has for me.

One other thing that's been happening - i'm feeling like God is starting to show me His long term plan in my life. He's withholding the short term, but i keep getting glimpses of what i believe is the long-term Big Picture for me... I seem to be noticing that one of my passions, and what i thought i would be doing for the rest of my life, Graphic Design, is not working out - every single time i try to pursue that career path, in the classes that i take, in the jobs i apply for, in almost every conceivable way relating to it, i find a closed door. On the other hand... for the past years i've had an interest in audio engineering, music production, acoustics engineering, and sound recording. Never really more than an interest, though. This was what both of my parent's had for careers. No offense to them, but i had no interest in following in their footsteps. Well with the advent of the Awake Project, i discovered that i needed to know a LOT more about audio engineering... Well then... doors started opening for me. I got into the best class i have ever had the privelege to be in - Audio Engineering 1 at Central Campus. I discovered a deep love for everything related to this field!! I don't think i've ever been excited about anything as much as i am now for this field... I have an idea it's not going to fade away, either. Since i started this semester i have seen so many doors open relating to this, concerning the Awake Project (I believe Matt, Adam, and especially Wesley will attest to this) concerning my own personal musical ventures, concerning job choice, concerning personal connections, and concerning a thousand other things related to this field. For the first time i believe i'm getting a life plan, one that will actually allow me to do something good for the Lord, and one that will put bread on the table for my family. I'm really seeing God's hand in this. I just thought i'd share that with yall :-)

Well this post actually turned out to be worthwhile, at least for me. =P

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